Red Alert: Chuck Norris Sighting

Chuck Norris thinks that Tim Tebow deserves another shot in the NFL.  How we wasn't immediately signed is beyond me.

This article could serve as a coda of sorts to the Sergio Garcia/Tiger Woods/fried chicken kerfuffle.

Maybe the Metro has some good ideas in it after all.

Ten for ten!  (Though probably nine for ten when I was 21.)

Responses:

1. I'm legitimately concerned about this.

2. I meant to check on Penguin yesterday to see if he is injured.

3. Sunday.  Can we have an Arrested Development review session?

4. Yes, please.

5. What other bear news?

6. When are you going to take me to the zoo?

B

the animals come out to play

crestor! *shakes fist to sky*

you mean, Penguin used to be able to fly? i'll push him off the balcony tonight!

it's coming! the origin of the mayon-egg was upsetting.

print it out and let's go!

this isn't really news but the other bear news was very upsetting.

man, this coat would perk up my rainy days. so would that attitude. =D

i'm not sure concern is the right word.

1. i think that is racist.  well, offensive in any case, because it was meant to be offensive. he was using some derogatory stereotype against someone in a way to offend him. is he racist for knowing that there's a connection there? no. is he racist for saying it? no. but he's a jerk for saying it. he was probably a jerk without saying it as well.

2. pauly d is more attractive than i realized.

4. i don't know about this guy on top chef but he basically serves belgian food so i'm all for it. beer, mussels and fries? sign me up.

Is This Racist? The Series

On this episode, Sergio Garcia makes a suggestion about what he'll serve for dinner if he were to invite Tiger Woods to join him.  Hilarity did not ensue.

What are your thoughts on this?

I was actually thinking Airbnb would be a good way to stay in New York without handing over your life savings.  A New York City court disagrees.

Another Top Chef restaurant is opening, this one in Logan Circle.

Responses:

1. I couldn't disagree more.  I think people overrate how much the President's policy proposals affect the national economy.  I think there are particular things like Obamacare or Sarbanes-Oxley that can hurt small businesses, and there are structural things like simplifying the tax code that can help everyone (except tax accountants, I guess), but I'm in the Milton Friedman school of thought when it comes to economic analysis.

2. Thank you, The Onion.  I imagine the well-performing equity markets are positively correlated with economic happiness.

3. I don't know her.  Most of my friends know not to climb that high.

4. I am not taking my singing showerhead to the beach.  I wouldn't own one to begin with, but how is that a suggestion?

B

a bearish economy

what are your thoughts on this?

according to the onion

oh no! do you know him (her?)?

unintentionally hilarious - a musical showerhead is a bridge too far and a designer drain is an everything too far

i can't stop thinking about this

No Regrets

I've been reading about some of the rumors surrounding the iPhone 5S.  It seems not that different from the iPhone 5.

It took me a minute to notice all the differences in the two proposed new Metro maps - not because I didn't notice the two, but rather because there are only two, and they are practically insignficant, and I kept looking for differences that weren't there.  Who honestly has a strong opinion about which one is better?  What were the citizen comments that prompted the revised version?  I have so many questions... I did enjoy the comments here, though.

I heard Roger Pilon speak on a couple of occasions.  He heard President Obama speak at Ohio State University.  I was definitely more impressed with Roger than Roger was with Obama.

This probably wouldn't last long in the fridge, would it?

Responses:

1. I saw the GIF thing a while ago.  It still cracks me up, so thanks for posting it.

2. I don't think I'm sophisticated enough for these...

3. I want to try all of them.

4. It's too bad about Southwest.  Don't take my golf course away, but that could be a really neat area with a little TLC.

5. I'm curious to hear your take on it.

From Leftovers:

1. If kids are so fragile that seeing a victorious opponent point to the heavens will destroy their self-esteem, then America is over.

3. Cecile (one of the secretaries) told me that Rappahannock Oyster Co. is amazing.  She's going this weekend.  I want to go!  You never take me anywhere!

B

all my friends are liberal

all my friends are liberal

chrome apps

some things to try

to read later

for the blog

responses to around town
1. knowing metro will be delayed has never changed my plans. i always assume it's delayed. i'm not going to start driving to work all of a sudden.
2. good for them? seems kinda silly i think. and i would be so hungry!
3. heard about it. i guess it's a good excuse as to why there have been construction signs for months but the escalator at mcpherson square still isn't fixed! "oh, we're just working on the redesign."
4. well puking in public could have to do with being sick, which can be pretty common when traveling. the rest, well...what else are you going to do in cancun?

responses to leftovers
1. so i guess we're done trying to improve self esteem? or is this kinda that ayn rand thing - these people are awesome at what they do so we should tear them down?
2. that would be totally unenforceable. perhaps we should work on something to expand the pathway to power or acknowledge that having smart mothers is not a bad thing. kinda denigrates the stay at home pathway and though i wouldn't choose that pathway, to each their own.
3. never tried any of those but have been meaning to try takorean.
4. haven't finished yet
5. well obviously but this doesn't make me hate it anymore. because that would be impossible. =P

Now It's Your Turn!

Write a post about this story.  You're always telling me about how the Billfold sees stories like this and goes gagaliberal on them.  Now you get to try.  It's (kinda) about personal finance, and it's short and sweet.  Go!

Some Conservative Blog Names for You for Inspiration

On the Washington Post, Jennifer Rubin runs a blog called Right Turn.

Tamara Tabo has a column on Above the Law called Righteous Indignation.

Here is somebody's list of the 60 best conservative blogs.

I think I mentioned Acculturated already.

I don't know if a pun is necessary, but it helps to establish the idea of the blog without being longwinded.  I think the idea of a phrase (like we used for You'd Like This) might also be neat, if it is sufficiently interesting.  Some thoughts:

"Conservatives Like TV Too"

"Wait, You're a Republican?" or "Did you know he was a Republican?"

"You're not going to like this"

I'm not really sure I like any of those, but maybe you'll be inspired based on how bad they are.

B

Leftovers

Here is a sample short blurb for this blog that I'm still waiting to post on:

We conservatives love the rule of law.  The immigration debate is a perfect example.  Despite the fact that it would be virtually impossible to deport all 11 million illegal immigrants currently in this country, many conservatives balk at the thought of immigration reform and find the idea of amnesty a complete non-starter, all because they don't want to reward violators of the law.

I get it:  people who break the rules shouldn't be rewarded.  But can we make an exception for these kids?  For those too lazy to click the link, the 4x100-meter relay team of a Texas high school had just finished demolishing the competition in a race, after which the anchor member of the team "pointed to the heavens" in victory.  Apparently, this violates the rule against "excessive celebration," and the winning team was disqualified, meaning that it could not compete at the state championship.

How is this a rule?  Maybe if the rule meant to capture celebrations like this or this, I could see a colorable argument for it.  But apparently Texas's rule includes any hand gestures.  The superintendent in the video (see previous link) seemed to indicate some remorse about the fact that the rule seemed to apply here, though he continued to insist that the rule applied.

Let's set aside the religious freedom argument for just a second and think about this.  Even if we stipulate that there was a rules violation, what is the purpose of this rule?  To make the losing kids feel better?  It seems like this rule will do nothing more than make four kids feel like crap for daring to be happy about their success.  Besides, you can always deal with actual instances of excessive celebration in the moment and in a manner more tailored to the circumstances.  If things get out of hand? Then maybe we can start talking about disqualification.

I get that the rule exists.  Still, can we make an exception?  I think we can all acknowledge that these kids didn't do anything really wrong.  But the bigger concern is that strict adherence to the rule of law in this case serves the purpose of undermining the general argument in favor of the rule of law.  If the rules are stupid and arbitrary and pick the wrong winners, then why is it a good idea to obey these rules, or any of the other ones for that matter?

I imagine there's a parallel to immigration laws (something like questioning why we're so obsessed with the fact that 11 million people broke the immigration laws when the immigration laws themselves create a broken immigration system, and, understanding that it's not okay that they broke the law, how we might consider making an exception for the illegal immigrants in this country, as long as we can reform the rules to make them more reasonable for all parties involved), but really I just wanted to vent about this story.  What a farce.

---

Here are some links:

This can't be right.

Have you ever been here?  I'd like to go.

I thought this was interesting.

Maryland sucks.

Around Town

Perhaps this should be required reading for us at the beginning of every week.

This is probably a good idea today.  It's a Monday and the weather isn't so great, plus they get press.  Also, I hate the DC government.

The Metro is getting a redesign for some reason.

Get pumped for our old friends, the cicadas.  Is there some way we can exterminate them?  Would that do irreparable harm to the environment?

I thought this article would be about the stereotypical obnoxious American tourist or whatever.  Instead, it kinda just sounds like spring break.

I'm pleased, but mostly because PETA isn't.

B

On Wit: just for fun

This happened with a friend of mine in her MBA interview.
Interviewer: So, tell me - what is it that keeps you up at night?
She was prompt in responding "Well, I watch a lot of movies"
-----------
The college professor had just finished explaining an important research project to his class. He emphasized that this paper was an absolute requirement for passing his class, and that there would be only two acceptable excuses for being late. Those were a medically certifiable illness or a death in the student's immediate family. A smart ass student in the back of the classroom waved his hand and spoke up. "But what about extreme sexual exhaustion, professor?" As you would expect, the class exploded in laughter. When the students had finally settled down, the professor froze the young man with a glaring look. "Well," he responded, "I guess you'll just have to learn to write with your other hand."
-----------
A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he's lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts: 
"Excuse me, can you help me? I promised my friend I would meet him half an hour ago, but I don't know where I am." 
The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet above this field. You are near 42 degrees N. latitude and 58 degrees W. longitude." 
"You must be an engineer," says the balloonist. 
"I am," replies the man. "How did you know?" 
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you've told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I'm still lost." 
The man below says, "You must be a manager." 
"I am," replies the balloonist, "but how did you know?" 
"Well," says the man, "you don't know where you are, or where you're going. You've made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is, you're in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now it's somehow my fault."
---------
A young couple had been arguing about what new vehicle they would buy. He wanted a big truck, but she wanted a sports car.
After about an hour the woman had to leave, and said, "look, all I want is something that goes from 0 to 200 in less than four seconds. My birthday is coming up next week, buy something that will surprise me!"
A week later she opened her present, a new set of bathroom scales!
(The funeral will take place next Tuesday)
----------
Private Jones was assigned to the Army induction center, where he was to advise new recruits about their government benefits, especially their Serviceman's Group Life Insurance (SGLI).  It wasn't long before the center's Lieutenant noticed that Private Jones had almost a 100% record for insurance sales, which had never happened before.  Rather than ask about this, the Lt. stood in the back of the room and listened to Jones's sales pitch.

Jones explained the basics of the SGLI to the new recruits, and then said.  "If you have SGLI and go into battle and are killed, the government has to pay $200,000 to your beneficiaries.  If you don't have SGLI, and you go into battle and get killed, the government has to pay only a maximum of $6000."
Now," he concluded, "which bunch do you think they are going to send into battle first?"
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Customer : Waiter, do you serve crabs? 
Waiter : Please sit down sir, we serve everyone. 
-----------
A lady at a party told a man, "Did you know that "sugar" is the only word in the english language that the "su" makes a "sh" sound? "
To which the man replied, " Really? Are you sure." 
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Reading exchanges as implying more than just a funny retort, one of my favorites is the "Wilma Flintstone" scene from the BBC's "Red Dwarf". The two characters are watching television when the following exchange occurs:

Lister: D'ya think Wilma's sexy?
Cat: Wilma Flintstone?
Lister: Maybe we've been alone in deep space too long, but every time I see that body, it drives me crazy. Is it me?
Cat: Well, I think in all probability, Wilma Flintstone is the most desirable woman that ever lived.
Lister: That's good. I thought I was going strange.
Cat: She's incredible!
Lister: What d'ya think of Betty?
Cat: Betty Rubble? Well, I would go with Betty... but I'd be thinking of Wilma.
Lister: This is crazy. Why are we talking about going to bed with Wilma Flintstone?
Cat: You're right. We're nuts. This is an insane conversation.
Lister: She'll never leave Fred, and we know it.

------------
Laconic comes from the Greek place name Laconia, the region in which Sparta (which of course gives us spartan) was located.  
One famous example comes from the time of the invasion of Philip II of Macedon. With key Greek city-states in submission, he turned his attention to Sparta and sent a message: You are advised to submit without further delay, for if I bring my army into your land, I will destroy your farms, slay your people, and raze your city." According to both accounts, the Spartan ephors sent back a one word reply: "If"
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 A linguistics professor lecturing a class says: "There are many languages where a double negation in the sentence makes it a positive sentence, but there is no language in the entire world where you see a double positive turn a sentence negative..."

Quick came a reply from the back of the class, "Yeah, right."